Like a child

"Miss Lindsay, do you need a hug?" - Tychelle, a kindergartner in my class

"You know what, I really could use a hug today...." - me

"Ok, but are you gonna tickle me??"

"No, I promise, I won't tickle you...."

As Tychelle hesitated and stood there an arms length away giggling, it dawned on me, "Tychelle, do you WANT me to tickle you?"

"YES!" and she giggled some more and gave me one of her huge, typically facetious smiles as she hugged me.

As I thought about that moment much later, the practical side of me thought, "She should have just told me she wanted to be tickled!" But than really, what fun is that?!

I began to think about all the times I've done that same thing...I KNOW I did that as a child, but even now....I catch myself being afraid to say the very thing that I want most, as if somehow I have to lead God down MY thought process until He figures out what I was really trying to say. The truth is, it's really the opposite. Too often I follow my own rabbit trail until I get far enough away from the situation that I'm finally able to realize that the very thing I was wanting isn't what I really wanted at all.

I'm so thankful that I get to work with the kids I do! The things they say have me holding back my laughter, and usually when I stop later and think about it I hear God reminding me of His truth. Seeing the world through the eyes of a child changes everything. I guess that's why Jesus told us in Matthew 18:3,

"Truly I say to you, unless you are converted and become like children, you will not enter the kingdom of heaven."

I know I can use all the help their little selves can give me! :)

From time to time...

I'm not typically one to post my thoughts for the world to see, but I feel inspired at the moment so we'll see what happens....

I feel as though I've spent so much of my life doing "good things", committing to things that will help someone, that have a great purpose and end result....and I'm so thankful for those opportunities!  I never want to be in a season of life, comfortable or stretched, and not be grateful for where God has placed me.  However, 2009 is a new year! 

My prayer as 2009 began was "God, YOU tell me what you've called me to do...specifically...right now....and let my focus be on nothing else!"  

And He did!  The last six months have been filled with challenges and struggles unlike anything I've walked through and yet because God clearly showed me where my time and focus should be I've known a joy and energy beyond my understanding!  I finally learned how to say "No."  and to not feel bad about it, because the revelation is that the pressure is on God and His promises.  His grace covers all that He calls us to, and I for one, don't want to spend my time trying to see how far His grace stretches...I'd much rather simply run in what he has for me.

"But the path of the righteous is like the light of dawn, that shines brighter and brighter until the full day....let your eyes look directly ahead and let your gaze be fixed straight in front of you.  Watch the path of you feet and all your ways will be established.  Do not turn to the right nor to the left..." Proverbs 4:18, 25-27